Wednesday, August 12, 2009

A Lesson in Love

On Friday night, Eric and I had the privilege of attending our friends' wedding. They got married at a park in downtown Milwaukee. It was a small gathering of family and friends, and I feel honored to have been there. Greg and Whitney go to The Ridge, and help out in the student ministry with us. They are great people and God is going to use them in mighty ways. They just don't know it yet...

The happy couple! Congrats Greg and Whitney!

Here is another happy family, right...well looks can be deceiving. I bet you would have never guessed just a couple hours earlier Eric and I got into a huge, knock down, drag out fight, all while our child was getting her two year portraits taken. It was not pretty, it was not fun, and it was not Godly, at all. Let me put an end to a myth that you all might think is true...pastor's are not perfect, and neither are their wives.

So it was a perfect fit for us to be going to a wedding that night. After having a huge fight with your spouse, don't you want to go listen to someone talk about love, respect, submission, and see two people madly, deeply in love. At this point I know God was laughing at us.

We messed up again, and we didn't treat each other very nicely, and respect was not really shown. After publicly having it out with each other in the mall, and in front of many walkers, we were fine. Stress, the world, high expectations, you name it got to us. We both broke, and caused the other one to break as well. Trust me, as a counselor, fighting is good, at least you are still communicating with each other. It's when you don't want to fight, well that's not good.

Eric and I asked for forgiveness right after the last blow was thrown, and we both forgave each other. And I think we both were truly embarrassed for doing it in public, that was a first for us.

So it was fitting for us to go listen about love, and watch two of our favorite people make it official, and start their lives out together. Just chalk it up to another lesson learned about love.
"However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband." Eph. 5:33


Joyeful said...

I just love your honesty!! Oh the lessons we learn! And we have been there! And I'm sure we'll be there again! This is something God is continually speaking to me about in our relationship b/c I tend to use words as a weapon when we argue and I know it is sin. We're so blessed to have husbands that will ask forgiveness when they are wrong though! That is not always the norm! I know I have a hard time admitting when I'm wrong myself! Thank God for marriage--it is continually making us more like Christ!

Veronica said...

Kate...I know your story all too well because I've experienced it so many times. I think what's hard for us is we met so young and have done a lot of growing up together. There are times when I find fault in so many things in my Hubby and forget to look at myself.

I just keep praying that the Lord would teach me to be the wife He wants me to be. I have a long road to go!

You are right about the fact that arguments happen to everyone...even a Pastor's family. I was a PK growing up and know all too well that people expect you to be perfect all the time. That's just not reality!

What a blessing you got to go to a wedding. I always feel changed after I get to see two people getting married. Makes me want to start fresh again in my own marriage!

Linda said...

We all have done it,...and it isn't pretty, and certainly not fun! Pride and self just rear their ugly heads too often if we aren't careful. But I am thankful that those we love forgive us,...just as Christ does.
IJohn 1:9

Love, Linda

Unknown said...

Marriages aren't perfect and they can be a lot of work. Husbands and wives can disagree on a lot of things! I just love how you put it all out there.

becca's bits said...

Haha...i can just picture you and Ferguson-Monkey going at it in the middle of the mall!! I think we've all been there...none of us are perfect, and it's times like these that make life REAL! Thanks for the honesty and thanks for sharing! :)

Kelly @ Sufficient Grace Ministries said... did I miss that you were Holly's cousin???!! That is so cool! Your post made me smile...even in describing a fight with your husband, you are so sweet! Boy, haven't we all been there? Tim and I had a silly tiff this week over our relatives! I agree with Joye...marriage certainly does work in us to make us more Christ-like.

The Corn City Festival is our town's little summer celebration. It takes place at the Deshler Park in the middle of our little town. There are air rides, some shows from local "talent", games, and food stands. We live in a small town, so it is just a little thing...but fun. There's even a parade in the evening. (Deshler's a tiny town about 30-40 minutes from Findlay)

Enjoy the Findlay's my favorite. Not too big or too small...just right!

Kristin said...

Congratulations to the new couple. I think your family picture looked great too......I'm sorry about your fight. I'm glad it all got worked out. I can't wait to see Molly's portraits.

Hope you're having a great week!

Debbie Petras said...

At least you are honest about this. I think too many people say "oh we never fight". Yeah, right? But it was kind of funny to read that you took your family photo and put on a happy face. And then the wedding? I'm sure the Lord has a sense of humor.

Becca said...

It happens! It is certainly no fun at all but you two obviously have the right attitude. I love that you were so honest in this post though!

How did Molly's pictures turn out? I can't wait to see!

L said...

You certainly look happy in the photo!!
I'm glad the storm clouds parted and the sun came out again in time to celebrate with your friends!!
lynette x