Sunday, December 16, 2012

My Thoughts on Sandy Hook

Friday was supposed to be like any other day, and I am sure for the parents of students at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, CT, Friday, December 14, has now changed their lives forever.  I am still in a state of shock, sadness, anger, and questioning after hearing, reading, and watching what all has transpired over the last 3 days.  I have not been able to articulate feelings or thoughts, I just cry, and pray for hope, hope for all the families, and for the world.

I will be honest, no other shooting since I have been alive has truly affected me like this one.  I know it's because I have a child in school, and is the same age as all those little babies running for their lives.  I sat and cried at work, I put my head down on my desk and sobbed.  When I watched the president give his speech, I cried again, I was touched by how it affected him, too.  I selfishly kept thinking of Molly, and her sitting in school, unaware of the evils in this world, and thinking about how beautifully naive she is.

I don't have answers for Friday's shooting, I don't know why, or how, or can even fathom what drives someone to want to kill innocent children, and adults.  I know after what those babes saw, they will never be the same.  I can't answer why God would allow this to happen, or where was God when this was going on.  Because truthfully, I have asked those same questions.

Here is what I do know, 26 innocent people lost their lives on Friday, 26 innocent, brave, heroes.  And may they always be remembered as that.  Someone who was clearly mentally disturbed did not receive the help he needed, which I hope this tragic event does not just open up the talks about gun control, but rather warning signs of people who truly need help.  People do not just snap, there are triggers and events that lead up to something like this.  Americans need to break the mental illness taboo and just talk about it.

I woke up on Saturday morning with two songs playing through my head.  One song I sang in my dream at a church service, and I remember that dream like it happened in real life and it brought me such peace in my dream.  When I can't find the words to express for myself, I latch onto a song and allow those lyrics to speak for me.  So while we are all trying to gather our thoughts, and as we are praying for all involved from families, kids, police, medical examiners, and even the grief counselors, please know we still have hope, a lot of hope.  That hope came in the form of a tiny baby, in a manager, at Christmas.              

For the lyrics to this song, go here

For the lyrics to this song, go here


Amber K. said...

Beautifully written, Kate...I've been struggling with this, too, and it helps to read the words of someone else who is thinking and wondering the same things. Thanks for writing this...

Jessica Heights said...

Such. a. tragedy. :(

Zion said...

I feel the same way. I don't think any event in my lifetime has hit me this way. With the Oklahoma City Bombing I was too young to really react the way that I am now that I have kids. I am going through the same thoughts and reaction you have had.